Celebrate Valentine’s Day 2017 With the Best of Late Night Dedication

There are many unsolved questions when it comes to matters of the heart. Do we swipe left or right? How long should you wait after receiving a text from your crush before replying, and with what emojis? How realistic is monogamy? Should we remain hopeful that someday, somewhere, we'll each find our soulmate, or is "true love" just another lie spread by Hallmark to make money? Why the hell did you ghost me?

The jury's out on all of the above — we here at CLRVYNT specialize in loudness, not love — but one thing we do know is that intimacy is inexorably enmeshed with most of our favorite art, and makes for killer music. So lies the premise of Late Night Dedication, where bands bless us with insights into their amorous adventures on and off the road. In observance of Valentine's Day, we've compiled some of the best tidbits from the series so far. 

Grunge trio Vomitface, revealing their desire to make out with famous musicians who also rock turtleneck sweaters:

Anyone in a turtleneck: Dave Grohl in 'Monkey Wrench' and [Nirvana's] MTV Unplugged [in New York]; David Bowie in 'I'm Afraid of Americans'; Sinead O'Connor in 'Nothing Compares 2 U' ... but not that Banana Republic shit Drake wears in 'Hotline Bling.' Special shout-out to the mock turtleneck in Michael Jackson's 'Scream.'

Read our full Late Night Dedication with Vomitface here.

Ultimate Painting's Jack Cooper, outlining the painstaking construction behind the first mixtape he ever gave to a crush:

I honestly don't remember the track list, but I guess I was about 13. I had a small all-in-one stereo system, which had a CD player, record deck and two cassettes. It would've been from a plastic bag of about 100 [7"s] my mom had given me ... lots of Kinks, Beach Boys and Zombies. Maybe the Stone Roses — when I was 14, they were my world. I do remember taking great care to make the gaps between songs as small as possible, and each song would have to carry on from the last: Primal Scream's 'Slip Inside This House' into the 13th Floor Elevators. Trying to be clever, I guess.

Read our full Late Night Dedication with Ultimate Painting here.

Husbandry bandleader Carina Zachary, throwing shade at *those* couples who suck face at metal concerts:

It's not really my cup of tea, but I won't hate on it. One instance comes to mind that kind of baffled me, though. It was at the Dillinger Escape Plan show in Brooklyn at Rough Trade a while back. This couple I was standing behind was sucking face pretty much the whole set. Which is fine, whatever. I can see how Dillinger's feral, primal energy and sounds might turn you on. But they're so amazing [that] I couldn't comprehend why you'd go to their show just to stand around and kiss. Much more fun to watch Greg [Puciato] cling to balconies and Ben [Weinman] somersault into the crowd. *Kanye Shrug*

Read our full Late Night Dedication with Husbandry here.

Noise-punk crew Soaker, describing their fantasies of kissing Shania Twain in subzero temperatures:

Shania Twain's under the cold Canadian moon. Mutt Lange is in the distant background, flailing in the icy sea. He calls for help, but we just ignore him as the freezing water fills his lungs. Adios, Mutt.

Read our Late Night Dedication with Soaker here.

Tiny Moving Parts frontman Dylan Mattheisen, on which musician knows the most about love:

Not Bret Michaels. I watched his Rock of Love TV show last week on Hulu, and he seems to be having trouble finding his soulmate. Poor Bret. [Author's note: He should've stuck with Brandi M.]

Read our Late Night Dedication with Tiny Moving Parts here.

Slothrust vocalist / guitarist Leah Wellbaum, recalling that one time she heard Fleetwood Mac in a Brooklyn bagel shop and burst into tears:

I was at Bagelsmith in Brooklyn one time, and I was having a hard time, and the Fleetwood Mac song 'Dreams' came on, and I just cried in that bagel store. The person I was with did, and they were nice about it. I feel like I've had the same thing happen with 'Heart of Gold' by Neil Young.

Read our Late Night Dedication with Slothrust here.

Fake Limbs bandleader Stephen Sowley, advising potential lovers on their sex soundtracks:

I really enjoy having records on for a very pragmatic reason, but also a sense of atmosphere. I’m not talking about Maxwell or whatever record you want to pull from the canon of trip-hop, but records that can elevate the cavalier activities at hand. Here are some that have definitely gone places:

Dead C — Harsh 70s Reality
Khanate — S/T
Don Cherry — Brown Rice
Emahoy Tsegué-Maryam Guèbrou — Éthiopiques 21
Oren Ambarchi — Grapes From the Estate
Francis Bebey — Akwaaba
Drive Like Jehu — Yank Crime
Express Rising — S/T (2013 release)

Read our Late Night Dedication with Fake Limbs here.

Godstopper vocalist / guitarist Mike Simpson, on whether good music taste matters in a potential partner:

It does matter, but never as much as we like to worry ourselves thinking it does. I think an open mind is the most important thing. If I was with someone who didn't really listen to Scott Walker 'cause she was a lawyer and worked 80 hours a week, but still she'd be down to at least peep a record with me and have a conversation about it, I would be a very happy man.

Read our Late Night Dedication with Godstopper here.

Singer and multi-instrumentalist Holly Miranda, declaring her concerts as make-out friendly-zones: 

Do you mean someone kissing me at my gig? Or someone kissing me at someone else’s gig? Or someone kissing someone else at my gig? In any case, I’m cool with all of it.

Read our Late Night Dedication with Holly Miranda here.