At a Loss: Check Out a Buzzov-en / Kirk Lloyd Mini-Doc

Buzzov-en built their legendary reputation on two cornerstones: their pioneering, punkish sludge, built to stand the test of time, and their predisposition for addiction, a ticking time bomb. Kirk Lloyd Fisher was well aware of this when he co-founded the band back in 1990; as the North Carolina native explains in a new documentary short, Buzzov-en: The Kirk Lloyd Story, he wasn't setting out to change the world — just to play some good music. "There wasn’t a certain mission about it or any specific thing," Fisher says. "I was just starting a heavy band."

Over 20 years after the band's formation, Fisher — now 47 — has settled down, spending his days at home in Salisbury, N.C., with his girlfriend Simerly, whom he met over Facebook while in and out of rehab. Having emerged victorious from a decades-long battle with addiction, he's long since distanced himself from Buzzov-en's debauched past; talking with filmmakers Alex Hale and Matt Holzapfel, he reflects on those infamous years with an expectedly weary tone, cigarette in hand. "New York we’d be doin’ heroin," he remembers, as footage from the band's heyday plays in the background. "The Midwest, we wouldn’t be doin’ anything, because the Midwest sucks. Northern California was all crystal meth."

"People are like, 'Well, you did what many people dream of!'" Fisher remarks later, and his face breaks into a knowing smile. "I’m like, 'Well, motherfucker, you can have my dream. It turned into a nightmare.'" These days, however, it seems that the man's nightmares have more or less receded; the short closes with an intimate acoustic duet between Fisher and Simerly, who's got an awesome voice. No matter how grisly his past, his present's looking pretty damn good. Watch below.